Lyrics
- Beautiful Stranger
- Love Tried to Welcome Me
- La Isla Bonita
- I'm Not Cool Enough to Listen to the White Stripes (the Madonna within mix)
Beautiful Stranger
Haven't we met?
You're some kind of beautiful stranger
You could be good for me
I've had the taste for danger
If I'm smart then I'll run away
But I'm a 'tard so I guess I'll stay
Heaven forbid I take my chance on a beautiful stranger
I looked into your eyes
And my world came tumbling down
You're the devil in disguise
That's why I'm singing this song
To know Ed, to know Ed is to love Ed
You're ed-vrywhere I go
And ed-vrybody knows
That to love Ed is to be part of Ed
I paid for you with tears
And swalloed all my pride
Da da da da da da da da da da da da
Beautiful Stranger
Da da da da da da da da da da da da
Beautiful Stranger
If I'm smart then I'll run away
But I'm a 'tard so I guess I'll stay
Haven't you heard?
I fell in love with a beautiful stranger
I looked into your face
And my heart was dancing all over the place
I'd like to change my point of view
That's if I could just forget about you
To know Ed, to know Ed is to love Ed
You're ed-vrywhere I go
And ed-vrybody knows
I looked into your eyes
And my world came tumbling down
You're the devil in disguise
That's why I'm singing this song to you
To know Ed, to know Ed is to love Ed
You're ed-vrywhere I go
And ed-vrybody knows
You came here from Florida
And brought the beep from Mount Dora
Da da da da da da da da da da da da
Beautiful Stranger
Da da da da da da da da da da da da
Beautiful Stranger
Beep
Love Tried to Welcome Me
These are my hands, but what can they give me?
These are my eyes, but they cannot see
These are my arms, but they don't know tenderness
And I must confess that I am usually drawn to sadness
And loneliness has never been a stranger to me
But love tried to welcome me
But my soul drew back
Guilty of lust and sin
Love tried to take me in
These are my lips, but they whisper sorrow
This is my voice, but it's telling lies
I know how to laugh, but I don't know happiness
And I must confess...
Instead of Spring, it's always Winter
And my heart has always been a lonely hunter
But still, love tried to welcome me
But my soul drew back
Covered with dust and sin
Love tried to take me in
Love tried to break me
And I must confess...
Instead of Spring, it's always Winter
And my heart has always been a lonely hunter
But still, love tried to welcome me
But my soul drew back
Guilty of lust and sin
Love tried to take me in
Love tried to welcome me
But my soul drew back
Covered with dust and sin
Love tried to take me in
Love tried to break me
But my soul drew back
Covered with dust, covered with sorrow
Cover me
Love tried to welcome me.
La Isla Bonita
[television blaring while singer is weeping:
"What you need to know to save your pet. And also coming up at 11, the new hallucinogenic drug that's ravaging the transgender community. Why they call it "Calgon," and why they say it makes them feel "like real girls." All this coming up at 11. Now back to Tyra."
Tyra Banks show returns on TV]
Calgon, take me away. [singer snorts some Calgon]
Last night I dreamt of San Pedro
Just like I'd never gone, I knew the song:
Young girl with eyes like the desert
It all seems like yesterday, not far away
Tropical the island breeze, all of nature wild and free
This is where I long to be: La isla bonita
And when the samba played,
The sun would set so high
Ring through my ears and sting my eyes
Your Spanish lullaby
I fell in love with San Pedro
Warm wind carried on the sea, he called to me:
De rico, Key Largo! [faux mangled Spanish]
I prayed that the days would last, they went so fast!
Tropical the island breeze, all of nature wild and free
This is where I long to be: La isla bonita
And when the samba played,
The sun would set so high
Ring through my ears and sting my eyes
Your Spanish lullaby
I want to be where the sun warms the sky
When it's time for siesta you can watch them go by
Beautiful faces, no cares in this world
Where a girl loves a boy and a boy loves...
a girl
[singer breaks down and cries, then snorts more "Calgon"; TV blares in background]
Last night I dreamt of San Pedro
It all seems like yesterday, not far away
Tropical the island breeze, all of nature wild and free
This is where I long to be: La isla bonita
And when the samba played,
The sun would set so high
Ring through my ears and sting my eyes
Your Spanish lullaby
Tropical the island breeze, all of nature wild and free
This is where I long to be: La isla bonita
And when the samba played,
The sun would set so high
Ring through my ears and sting my eyes
Your Spanish lullaby
La la la la la la la
Pe rico quinarbo [faux Spanish again]
La la la la la la la
I'm drinking a soy latte
I get a double shot-tay
It goes right through my body
And you know I'm satisfied
I drive a Mini Cooper and I'm feeling super-duper
And they tell me I'm a trouper and you know I'm satisfied
I do yoga and Pilates and the room is full of hotties
And I'm checking out the bodies and you know I'm satisfied
I'm just living out the American dream, and I just realized that nothing...
is what it seems...
I'm Not Cool Enough to Listen to the White Stripes (the Madonna within mix)
Blessed is he who reads aloud the words of the prophecy, and blessed are those who hear.
And to keep what is written therein, for the time is near.
He is coming with the clouds, and every eye will see him; everyone who pierced him. And all the tribes of the Earth will wail on account of him.
Those of you who have not learned what some call "the deep things of Satan," I know your works.
I know your toil and your patient endurance.
And how you cannot hear evil men but have tested those who call themselves "apostles," but are not. And found them to be false.
I know you are enduring patiently, and bearing out for my name's sake.
And you have not grown weary.
But I have this against you: that you have abandoned the love you had.
I know your tribulation and your poverty, and the slander of those who say that they are Jews. But they are not. They are a synagogue of Satan.
Do not fear what you are about to suffer. Behold the Devil is about to throw you into it.
I'm not cool enough to listen to the White Stripes
I'm not cool enough to listen to the White Stripes
I'm not cool enough to listen to the White Stripes
I'm not cool enough to listen to the White Stripes
And I saw a beast rising out of the sea with ten horns and seven heads and a blasphemous name upon its head.
And the beast that I saw was like a leopard; its feet were like a bear's; and its mouth was like a lion's mouth. And to it, the Dragon gave his power, and his throne and great authority.
One of its heads had a mortal wound, but it seemed to have a mortal wound that was healed.
And the whole earth followed the Beast with wonder.
Men worshiped the dragon for he had given his authority to the beast, and they worshiped the beast saying, "Who is like the beast, and who can fight against the beast?"
And the beast was given a mouth uttering hearty and blasphemous words, and it was allowed to exercise authority for forty-and-two months.
It opened its mouth to utter blasphemous words against God.
It was allowed to make war on the saints and to conquer them.
And authority was given it over every tribe and people and tongue and nation, and all who dwell on earth will worship it in vain.
If anyone has an ear, let him hear.
If anyone is to be taken captive, into captivity he will go.
If anyone who slays with the sword, with the sword....
(I'm not cool enough to listen to the White Stripes....)
Are you cool enough to listen to the White Stripes?
You can vote for Angelyne if you listen to the White Stripes.
Are you cool enough to listen to the White Stripes?
Vote for Angelyne.
The White Stripes...
Then I saw a new Heaven and a new Earth.
And I heard a great voice from the throne saying,
"Behold the dwelling of God is with men. He will dwell with them, and they shall be his people.
And God himself will be with them. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more.
Neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore.
For these things will have passed away.
To the thirsty I will give water without price.
From the fountain of the water of Life.
He who conquers shall have this heritage, and I will be his god and he shall be my son.
But as for the cowardly, the faithless, the polluted;
As for the murderers, fornicators, sorcerers, idolaters and all liars...
Their lot shall be in the lake that burns with fire and brimstone."
And he said to me; he said to me,
"Do not seal up the words of the prophecy, for the time is near.
Let the evildoers still do evil and the filthy still be filthy
And the righteous still do right, and the holy still be holy
Behold, I am coming soon.
I am the alpha and the omega, the first and the last, the beginning...
And the end.
Amen.
Are you cool enough?
